What is a Feminist?…really

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  • #602362

    happywalker
    Participant

    I hear the term feminist thrown around all of the time. In Rush Limbaugh terms it’s feminenazi…what ever. I believe a feminist is just a female of any age that wants the same rights as any man. What is so wrong with that? It’s a term that is said like a bad taste in ones mouth. My age, let’s just say that I was a teenager and singing along with the Monkeys 45’s.

    #749643

    DBP
    Member

    I’m going to be painfully honest with you, happy.

    Regardless of what the definition of feminist should be, and regardless of what the word means to you, personally . . . over the years, the term has come to be associated, in the minds of many people, with a certain stereotype of a female who is pushy, threatening to men, and unattractive.

    Unfortunate, I know. But there it is.

    #749644

    JoB
    Participant

    i cried when my daughter told me that feminism was an unnecessary attack on men .. 20 years ago.

    That same daughter chose a male dominated career and fought sexism nearly every day.

    i don’t know if she has changed her mind yet.

    I sincerely hope so.

    She may never have daughters of her own but she has nieces she passionately wants to have the same opportunities that are extended to her nephews.

    After 40 years of fighting it seems all we women have gained is the responsibility of equality without any of the privileges.

    unless of course you have a lot of money and an indulgent parent…

    The trouble is that women gained that kind of privilege centuries ago.

    #749645

    pattilea
    Participant

    Interesting subject, I just read in the Leader a Port Townsend newspaper about a Mother daughter team. They walked from Spokane to New York in 1896, to prove the endurance of women, and women’s rights It took 232 days and they wore out 32 pair of shoes. The book is called “The year we were famous” by Carol Estby Dagg. It was her great-grandmother and great-aunt.

    #749646

    JoB
    Participant

    pattilea..

    small world.

    i picked up that book a while ago.

    well worth reading.

    it’s good to remind ourselves that women have quietly been doing remarkable things for a very very long time.

    the sad sequel to that story is that after everything they went through to succeed I believe they were ultimately cheated out of their prize.

    Nelly Bly is another intrepid explorer from that time period.. well worth reading about how a plucky young woman set out to traverse the world.. and succeeded.. and won her prize.

    she wrote her own book:)

    It’s easy to see mountain-climbers and Iditarod contestants as the adventurers of our time..

    but the real battlefield is that between conventions and independence…

    surprisingly, homeless women often end up in the forefront of that struggle…

    or should i say that women who battle conventions without resources often end up homeless?

    i recently picked up “No Room of her own” by Desiree Hellegers from our local library. It tells the story of several local homeless women in their own words as well as outlining a historical perspective on homelessness in general and women’s homelessness in particular.

    I promise to return it wednesday evening.

    i found it in the new reads section.

    not what i would call an easy read because it makes us too aware of the fragility of our own realities..

    but it has been another one of those eye opening books for me.

    If not for chance i could very easily live among them.

    #749647

    pattilea
    Participant

    The Author was a speaker here in Port Townsend last night. I got in to late from West Seattle last night, so I missed it. I am hoping he will be around the bookstore today. I am going to pick up a copy.

    Port Townsend is my other West Seattle, small town so caring of it’s neighbors, and community. I am a native West Seattle born and raised.

    #749648

    kmweiner
    Member

    DBP

    Your statement “with a certain stereotype of a female who is pushy, threatening to men, and unattractive.” Is significant because anything a woman does to assert her right to be treated as a human being IS perceived by men as threatening. If a man does it, it is assertive: if a woman does it, it is aggressive. Laurel Thatcher Ulrich..said “Well behaved women seldom make histroy”. I would go further to say men have a right to feel threatened. We are NOT IN a rebellion, we are in a REVOLUTION— and a battle for our lives if the Repubs have their way with us.

    #749649

    datamuse
    Participant

    Gosh, DBP. I think all of us were unfamiliar with that stereotype before you mentioned it.

    But here’s the really interesting question, and sarcasm aside, I’m genuinely interested in the answer: why do you think it’s come to mean that to so many people?

    And, bonus round: what does attractiveness have to do with it?

    #749650

    JoB
    Participant

    thanks kmweiner and datamuse

    i missed DBPs comment

    probably a good thing

    i wouldn’t want to come across as one of those unattractive overbearing threatening women

    sweet little advanced middle aged slightly rotund lady that i am ;->

    hubby was tickled last weekend when we went to the pictures and i qualified for a senior discount :)

    that … and finally being able to speak my mind without immediately offending the sensibilities of all the men within hearing distance are two of the perks of growing older:)

    #749651

    miws
    Participant

    Republicans are also…….

    Burglars:

    Serial Adulterers:

    Druggies:

    Mike

    #749652

    kootchman
    Member

    Wanna add JFK, FDR, and half of Hollywood donors to round out the pictures?

    #749653

    casaboba
    Member

    Hey, miws learned how to post photos. Cool!

    #749654

    ws4ever
    Member

    Those offended by an equitable equal pay for equal work system, or who are offended by a standard that women have to put forth much more effort in presentation in order to be considered as “professional” as men, probably were raised to think they were of inherently higher status than women. Everybody should have a chance to work hard and contribute what they can. DBP thinks that by framing insults as a joke he can laugh at other people HE would like to assume superiority over. It’s been done before, DBP. We are not impressed by this tactic, DBP. Exceptional people do not use this tactic. Scoffing just distracts people from what’s relevant.

    #749655

    JoB
    Participant

    kootchman..

    we are members of a protected class except when we aren’t..

    like when one in four of us is being battered by our domestic partner.. generally male

    you can keep your protection

    i’ll take equality instead and protect myself

    #749656

    JanS
    Participant

    Kman…sometimes you’re full of crap…did you know that? And…women don’t want to be men…what the hell does wearing makeup have to do with anything? We can wear makeup and be equal, for God’s sake…or are you implying that it’s just another thing us witches do to entice men? (you know, our devious ways) I can’t tell you how offensive that is, because you won’t get it. You DON’T get it !

    #749657

    WSB
    Keymaster

    It is offensive and I’m deleting it.

    Sexism has absolutely ZERO place on WSB and I’m sorry that nobody flagged me on this. But I am here right now to poke around and see what’s up. I won’t get to everything, so if something else as malodorous is lurking out there, please let me know.

    As for D’s description of feminism .. as a woman who definitely can be described as unattractive (in the conventional sense – since fat is still demonized), pushy, and threatening-to-men (who comprise 95% of the haters with whom we’ve dealt over the years, including 100% of the ones we’ve had to sic a lawyer on for defamation, and 100% of the ones we’ve had to report to police for threatening me and my family with violence, but I will NOT hold that against the gender in general) … well … what’s unfortunate about that? Frame it in more neutral terms and particularly the assertiveness part is pretty appealing. We should all stand up for ourselves and our rights, regardless of gender.

    I am human, hear me roar.

    Tracy

    #749658

    redblack
    Participant

    But here’s the really interesting question, and sarcasm aside, I’m genuinely interested in the answer: why do you think it’s come to mean that to so many people?

    low breeding. see the first 5 minutes of idiocracy for an example.

    i’m serious. people aren’t getting any smarter. and their parents aren’t helping.

    there’s a lot of female exploitation among generation Y and millenials, propagated by social networking.

    #749659

    datamuse
    Participant

    I missed kootchman’s comment, and I’m glad.

    I will comment, however, that I have never, ever wanted to be a man, for all that it would have made life easier in a lot of ways (it also would have made life more difficult in a lot of ways; I know that).

    A person who finds themselves to be a gender other than the one they were born with is transgender, not feminist (though most transgendered people I know are also feminists).

    Feminists want a place at the table without also being expected to bring the coffee in. (And if you think those days are gone, I have a lovely oceanfront property in Florida for sale.)

    #749660

    kootchman
    Member

    I hit upon a truth… so of course it was deleted. Twas about an entire set of gender privileges which are exploited and never acknowledged. Indeed they are heavily exploited. Feminists are extraordinarily bound to a strict doctrinaire… general enough opinion? That would be my guess.

    #749661

    kootchman
    Member

    datamuse… if you are brining in the bucks… I’ll get the coffeee.

    #749662

    JanS
    Participant

    no, kootch…they were offensive…and if that’s what you think of women in general, I feel sorry for you, and the women in your life…period. It was the editor’s call to remove it. No one reported it…we already know that you will take things to extremes…but, get a clue…OK?

    #749663

    inactive
    Member

    Will somebody please tell me what the deleted post said? What what what?

    ?:(?

    #749664

    JoB
    Participant

    kootch..

    there was no TRUTH in your comment kootch…

    i will agree that you repeated the rationalizations that some men use to trivialize women and their concerns..

    but that does NOT make it truth

    #749665

    JoB
    Participant

    dood…

    kootch pulled out the old saw about women and the way they use their feminine wiles to get what they want and the way that gives them an unfair advantage to get out of doing “real” work because men protect them

    only he didn’t put it nearly as nicely

    #749666

    miws
    Participant

    kootch, what you describe as gender privileges, will only be such, when women actually have significantly more rights than you and I as males do.

    Mike

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