Creep at Ercolini Park

[Spring Chicken]

Thank you littlebrowndog! Parents of tots, your kids will someday have schoolmates with autism spectrum disorder, so if you can educate yourself now you will be able to help them understand better too.

Share This

[JTB]

Wake, the penchant for sensationalism on the part of mass media is what Jon Stewart characterizes as “corrupt.” In discussion, he seems to mean the failure of journalism to perform its historic task of informing the public. However, the political class has discovered that appealing to one group’s fears and directing their attention to another group is a good way to perpetuate division and obscure the actual causes of the uncertainty and instability we face. So we have an ideal joining of politics and media to form “politainment” and keep the public distracted. The White House Correspondents’ Dinner has become an open celebration of celebrity and power across Hollywood, professional sports and politics as driven by the media machine. Debord’s notion of the Society of the Spectacle sheds some light on this sorry state of affairs.

Meanwhile, this thread demonstrates the importance of real communication and the potential pitfalls of social media when people fail to distinguish between the two. Meeting someone in person to have an informed discussion. How retro, how authentic.

Share This

[wakeflood]

Yup, JTB. Hope you weren’t assuming I was condoning the sensationalism ritual or giving folks a free pass. I was merely suggesting that it’s pervasive and our (now trained) reaction to it is predictable, Pavlovian.

And yes, face-to-face can rip down the facades and encourage actual communication.

Share This

[ttt]

thanks for the info on the camoflauge wearing boy. I called him evasive because I have only seen him playing out military type games (hiding behind trees, running away from and hiding when others walk by, and acting out military type play). Sometimes it is difficult to tell from a distance if someone is trying to play or is heading towards trouble, especially in the teenage years. An eagle eye on everyone around us is not a bad thing, when we don’t know them personally. Education definitely helps us understand each other better, and meeting face to face. I ave been educated by these posts, and that’s why I love the blog.

Share This

[Cait]

The bottom line is, if you’re uncomfortable you need to speak up and draw clear boundaries. And the person’s autism is an issue only when you take into account the presumptuous/offensive language the OP used… it doesn’t mean they will or will not harm a child. If you draw a boundary and they don’t comply – that’s a sign of potential harm regardless of mental faculty. If they do comply, you are likely just dealing with someone who has a hard time with social cues for any number of possible reasons. (Incidentally this is an invaluable lesson to teach your children so that they can protect themselves when you are not around. It might also help them better understand a person with autism if they are able to draw those boundaries, have them respected and interact with a person in a healthy way.)

That said – the word “creep” got my hackles up too, especially knowing how many wonderful folks we have in this community who are recognizable and friendly but suffer from mental health issues. There’s a healthy medium between paranoia and naivety in which most people navigate… just make your boundaries clear.

Share This

[JoB]

Cait… well put

but it reminds me that most people don’t have a clue how to quietly and firmly set boundaries…

that for some “it’s been nice meeting you” sounds like an invitation for further conversation instead of the implied message “i am done with this conversation and it’s time for you to leave”

and i think that distinction is especially difficult for anyone with neurological or developmental complications.

Share This

[beachdrivegirl]

As a mom of two three and under I appreciate others making me more aware of what I may encounter at a variety of parks. I don’t believe any poster here is 100% certain that the original posters concerns weren’t valid so I don’t understand the dismissing of them. We need to all keep an eye out in our community.

Share This

[Cait]

I don’t think anyone is dismissing the concern, but taking issue with the tone/language used.

JoB – drawing boundaries can definitely be awkward. I think we all need a refresher course from time to time and this instance is a good reminder :)

Share This

[littlebrowndog]

Just a reminder that I am going to hang out for a while at the park tomorrow morning at 10 if anybody would like to join me and learn more about Autism Spectrum Disorders. And if interested I can also describe a few ways of responding in situations like that when somebody is saying or doing something that is uncomfortable. For example, “I’m not comfortable with [name the actions] and I would like you to [name actions]. Thanks.”

Short reddish hair, glasses, green shirt. Looking forward to meeting more of my neighbors!

Donna

Share This

[Smitty]

Such a “Seattle” thread.

The OP DIDN’T KNOW THE KID HAD AUTISM!

Good god, I’m surprised this hasn’t turned into a witch hunt to search out and publicly humiliate the poster for trying to WARN people of what he/she thought was a scary situation.

Relax folks. Do you you really think the OP thinks people with Autism are creepy?

Or, do you really expect a poster – with 2 total posts – to come back and apologize and/or change the wording of the original post because the 20 people who frequent this board daily are offended?

Get over yourselves.

Share This

[JanS]

Smitty…my opinion only, but..the OP did not know, yes, that’s true. And now they do, because of posters on here. There’s even someone offering to talk with people about autism, how to recognize it, etc., and that’s an awesome thing. Not everyone was chastizing the OP. Those who did, should stop, it was an innocent mistake. Those who still promote the “creepy” part should stop, and go away. It contributes to nothing. I think we’re all smart enough to be aware of our surroundings.

I love the educational part of this thread..good conversation, good bringing awareness to those who aren’t.

Now, you dumping on people who do come here regularly, is not exactly fair. After all…you are one of them , even if you think not :)

Have a great weekend :D

Share This

[Smitty]

“There’s even someone offering to talk with people about autism, how to recognize it, etc., and that’s an awesome thing.”

Agree 100%.

“you are one of them”

Oh, I know! The 20 included me….. :~)

Share This

[miws]

Smitty, in skimming back through these posts, I don’t see, IMHO, any posts that indicate that the pitchforks have been taken out of the shed, and that the rags for the torches are soaking in white gas.

I think somebody that has made a thread/post, that basically involves name calling, and making assumptions about somebody they don’t know, should have a thick enough skin to handle a little bite back.

It would be nice for the OP to come back in and share more thoughts, given the info that has been posted so far, and it would be nice to know that the OP is going to take littlebrowndog up on her kind offer.

Mike

Share This

[beachdrivegirl]

Smitty I still don’t think we know that the “creep” original post referenced was the neighborhood kid with Autism. (Which if it was why wasn’t he in school?)

And yes this is ridiculous to “attack” the OP for calling the person a creep. For example I think most all of us agreed (even those downgrading the OP) thought the Beach Drive flasher was a creep because flashing is a creepy behavior. If it is a creepy behavior it results in the offender being called a creep.

I do agree more people need to be educated on Autism. But this wasn’t the place to do it.

Share This

[JoB]

and where exactly would you suggest we educate people about how to interact in public with people who have autism if not in a discussion about an interaction with a kid that has autism?

Share This

[KBear]

Smitty and Beachdrivegirl, I think what people are suggesting is that one shouldn’t resort to calling someone a creep or assume they are a child molester when there may well be a perfectly innocent explanation for their unusual behavior. That doesn’t mean you can’t be suspicious or take steps to protect yourself or your children. But the “attacks” began in the original post, they were ignorant and unjustified, and others were right to call it out.

Share This

[JanS]

BDG…the OP said…he said his name was Brice – not a common name. Someone else said..oh, yes, Brice is autistic…so, yes, we can probably assume we’re talking about one in the same…the descriptions match. As far as school is concerned. I would bet he may be specially schooled, home schooled. Sometimes autistic children are not integrated into the regular public school culture. And, of course, we have no idea what time of day this was, because the OP did not mention it.

I would have been happier if the OP had used the term “suspicious person”, myself. “Creep” was a bit strong for my taste. Now the man who is flashing at Holy Rosary School? That’s worthy of calling him a “creep”..

Share This

[beachdrivegirl]

I am sure there is more than one Brice in the world. Maybe in your generation Brice isn’t a common name but I know three off the top of my head. And I know I have met others throughout my lifetime. So checking out a diaper change more closely than a parent likes isn’t creepy? I know it has been awhile since you have had kids but that is creepy behavior.

Share This

[JanS]

oh, thanks for pointing out “my generation”, like I’m ancient. Age is a number, remember that as you get older ;-)

Twice you mentioned something about my age…and for the record I still have a kid…she is almost 34…and she has a kid, too…age 4 months…and I see him every day. And that has nothing to do with the thread, so…..

education is everything BDG…and yes, being suspicious around strangers that make us feel uneasy is OK…but have you really read this thread thoroughly and absorbed what people have said? I don’t think so. All said parent had to do was tell person in uncomfortable situation to move on. They don’t have to go overboard, and label them as a creep and , heaven forbid, think there was something “sex offender-ish” about them. Just be cautious, that’s all.

Share This

[JoB]

beachdrivegirl..

the first issue i have with the OPs post is that it violated the basic rule of the forum…

no name calling

whether you or the OP thought it was justified or not..

it’s not ok here.

the second issue i see with with the OPs post is that she tells us she told him to leave and he did…

i fail to see the problem since the kid clearly understands the basic premise of boundaries. she states that he immediately complied.

the third issue i have with the OPs post is that after she told the young man to leave and he did…

she took his picture

She didn’t like his questions, she told him to leave and he did… and she still took his picture….

now that’s creepy

if i was his parents i would have an issue with that.

Share This

[waterworld]

How can it be against the rule to call someone a creep on this blog/forum when it happens all the time, with nary a negative comment nor a reprimand or post-removal? So far as I can tell, based on a quick google search of “creep” on the blog/forum, the primary difference between this post and many other posts related to suspicious or criminal behavior is that more often than not, “creep” is reserved for adults suspected or accused of engaging in creepy behavior, whatever that is, rather than teenagers who do so, although there are plenty of instances of the latter as well. Also, frequently “creep” is used in reference to persons suspected of crimes or charged with crimes and, of course, people convicted of crimes, but it is by no means limited to the criminal realm. But even if the term is permitted in reference only to individuals accused or convicted of crimes, it is still name-calling.

So there definitely is no rule prohibiting name-calling on this site. If there is a rule limiting the scope of name-calling, it is unwritten, and it would appear that the only way to determine the permissible scope of using “creep” in reference to another person is to unwittingly step over the line, as the OP is said to have done.

Today, for the first time, I am learning that it is also creepy to take a photo of someone who has creeped you out. This is surprising, because I have also read on this blog/forum numerous, if not countless times, that we should take photos of people who behave suspiciously or creepily, so that if it should turn out that the creep progresses (or regresses) from creepy behavior to something downright criminal, the police will have something to use to track the creep down. My best effort to harmonize these two directives leads me to conclude that taking photos of creeps is encouraged, other than in situations where the experience of being creeped out could possibly be due to a misunderstanding of the behavior that seems creepy, in which case it is best to engage in accurate diagnosis of the person whose behavior seems creepy or to politely establish a more appropriate boundary, or both.

Whew!

Share This

[JoB]

Wake..

LOL.. he’s a kid.

who wasn’t engaging in illegal behavior

and who left when asked…

i am pretty sure if anyone had taken photos of the OP’s kids..

she would have considered it more than creepy…

Our list of who appears creepy or dangerous has gotten so long it will soon extend to grandmothers cooing at babies…

sorry fellas.. granddads who coo at babies are already considered creepy :(

Share This

[diane2726]

Just my 2 cents…This “creep” is a super nice kid- (16 or older) He means no harm to anyone. Would always come up to our neighborhood and run around with neighborhood kids and play around like they were soldiers. My children refer to him as “Army boy”. Always very polite, friendly and nice around my kids. All he wants to do is enjoy life. If pretending that he is a army soldier, we need to let him be who he is. His name is not Brice. Hes not out to harm anyone. He did go to WS high. My kids and I still enjoy seeing “army boy” in and around the junction. If you do feel uncomfortable around him, move away from him. I’m just sticking up for him- I enjoy seeing him around and is always happy- harmless

Share This

[diane2726]

Share This

[WSB]

IMPORTANT.

Like the game of “Telephone,” this thread seems to have lost track of the fact that the original “creep” or person of concern is NOT the young man who is being discussed in the last few posts. The original poster mentioned someone of concern at the park – and then mentioned, SEPARATELY, the young man known for wearing camouflage, in a different context, NOT as the “creep” in the headline.

We too have met the NOT-CREEP young man many a time … when we first started boothing at festivals and events in 2008, he would come up and say hi, often multiple times. He’s been shown in photos here at least a few times – he helped carry a banner at a parade, for example. Every time I’ve met or seen him, he’s had a huge, friendly smile. Not such a common thing.

The fact that so many people know him, know of him, is one of those small-town traits that really does still linger here. A town is the sum of its people, much more than its buildings, etc.

I admire how the discussion took some turns and has even led to one member offering to talk with people about autism, in a wider context of understanding people who seem different.

But while I hadn’t been flagged and haven’t read every single post – I have been trying to parachute into the forum to kill spam more often and then I have to get back to other stuff (it’s 4:28 am and I still have two things to write before napping) – I did want to correct this one particular thing. Please go back and look at the original post and see for yourself.

thanks

Tracy

Share This

[Author]

Posts