Home › Forums › Open Discussion › Back handed compliments / passive aggressive insults
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January 10, 2014 at 9:56 pm #610150
LindseyParticipantAll you can do is let this crap slide like water off a duck’s back, but sometimes it’s nice to vent, right? Here are some classics I’ve received. Feel free to post yours! We can all cringe together.
From my brother’s girlfriend, when I was pregnant and wearing a cute striped dress: “What a bold choice. Most pregnant women wouldn’t be caught dead in horizontal stripes.”
Earlier this week, a coworker noticed that I had straightened my naturally curly hair. “Wow, Lindsey. You look so nice when you brush your hair.”
And lastly, any compliment that ends in “…for a woman” or worse, “…for a girl.”
January 10, 2014 at 10:12 pm #802988
SJoyParticipantWhen I was pregnant with my first child, my ex-husbands grandmother (little old Asian lady) told me one day that I was having a boy – because I was “ugly”.
January 10, 2014 at 10:28 pm #802989
JoBParticipantor.. for your age
January 11, 2014 at 12:50 am #802990
JanSParticipantJoB…I keep telling you you look great “for your age”…hehehehehe
January 11, 2014 at 1:29 am #802991
JoBParticipantJanS.. today i don’t look so great.. for any age :(
January 11, 2014 at 2:06 am #802992
seaopgalParticipantMaybe not quite the same thing, but I get a lot of “You got your hair cut!” … followed by dead silence. As if I didn’t know? So much nicer to hear, “I like your hair cut” or “New cut? Looks nice.”
January 11, 2014 at 2:45 am #802993
JoBParticipantWe spent a few years in Minnesota..
and being a west coast girl i thought “interesting” when applied to my style was a compliment..
not so much :(
January 11, 2014 at 3:44 am #802994
SarahScootParticipantseaopgal: YES, that’s so awkward. Not a local thing, but I’ve heard that “bless your heart” is generally Southern for “F#!* you.”
I know I got a few while pregnant and when my son was really little, but I can’t recall any specifics.
January 11, 2014 at 3:56 am #802995
trickycooljParticipantI had a hair color mishap last October. My desk neighbor at work said good morning without turning away from her computer and we went along chatting as I settled in. Then she turned around “OH WHOA…. Your hair. Um. That’s not how it’s meant to be is it?” It was… My blond hair had sucked in the copper color so well it was orange in big sections underneath with a darker brown on top. I’m kinda plain jane and wanted fall color highlights and the big sections just looked too intense for the office. Coworker continued “so are you a Broncos fan or something?”
That sealed the deal, I texted my stylist and got some corrections that night. Luckily it was October so I could say it was Halloween themed or something but man what a day in the office “Whoa! Your hair!” That’s never good.
January 11, 2014 at 5:49 am #802996January 11, 2014 at 5:13 pm #802997
FionaEnzoParticipantVbd stop that – I just got stuck in a Pee Wee Herman vortex. Watched your clip then proceeded to watch a few more – love me some Pee Wee. So much fun.
January 11, 2014 at 6:07 pm #802998
2 Much WhineParticipantI LOVE this one. I hadn’t seen my mother-in-law for about a year. I had put on a few pounds over the year and when she saw me during our annual Christmas trek she greeted me with “Wow! You’ve had a very. .. . . (pregnant pause). . . . “prosperous” year.” That one stuck with me.
January 11, 2014 at 9:06 pm #802999
JoBParticipantJanuary 11, 2014 at 9:11 pm #803000
KatherineLParticipantAnd how about these?
You’d be so pretty if…
…you lost some weight.
…you wore make-up.
…you dyed the grey in your hair.
January 12, 2014 at 1:03 am #803001
JoBParticipanthow about
…i bet you were really pretty when you were young…
…if you could wear heels that would be an incredible outfit
…for a minute there i thought you had lost weight
January 12, 2014 at 1:10 am #803002
JoBParticipanthave you noticed that we haven’t strayed over the oh so painful line past appearances?
January 12, 2014 at 5:51 am #803003
birdrescuerParticipantHave you noticed that only women are responding to this post?
January 12, 2014 at 7:16 am #803004
JanSParticipant2much whine would argue that point, birdrescuer ;-)
January 12, 2014 at 3:17 pm #803005
miwsParticipantYeah, the two or three times I’ve met 2MW face to face, he’s at least appeared to be male. ;-)
Mike
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