I don’t think the MAIN intention or goal of most people participating in this forum is to change other people’s minds or behavior. As in most things we do in life, it’s more about ourselves — to express ourselves, to reinforce our identity, to fulfill our own needs in some way. Some people post to amuse themselves or in hopes of amusing others. Some post because they are bored, some out of a need to be helpful. Some love to argue even if both sides are entrenched, some just like to rant (or less often to rave). But I think we mostly want to show that we exist and that someone, somewhere is listening to us.
We all want and need to be heard … the worriers, the snarlers, the snarkers, the dour, those who use ellipses with abandon, the moderate, the logical, the starry-eyed optimists, those who can’t resist a lame joke, the materialistic, the NIMBYers, the self-righteous, the altruistic, the mediators, the [fill in the blank] … and I, for one, think we all deserve to be heard (or at least to speak).
Anticipated negative, sarcastic reaction:
“Oh so I guess we should all just think like CAIT does! That would solve everything!”
One step ahead of ya, keyboard jockeys! :) jk
I feel like people have a hard time on here knowing when to just STOP. Constructive conversation can turn VERY quickly into judgement of ones neighbors in ways that you would NEVER articulate to someone’s face. What people forget, often, is that these people who are nameless and faceless to you on here are all here because they are your neighbors. The person you are berating on here for their opinion could be your checker at the store… you just never know. You’d think that would stop people in their tracks.
I don’t understand why people think that hearts and minds can be changed on certain topics. Often these start as “rants” that are almost never useful and are frequently very harsh. I have thought to myself many times “I should really make a post about this on the forums” – but I can tell you with 99% accuracy what kind of response it will get every time. And it’s never worth it.
I feel like we should all take an oath before setting up an account on here:
I understand that no one is ever going to stop biking because it inconveniences you.
No one is ever going to change the way they parent because of your anonymous rant.
I understand that no one is every going to stop loving their dog because you b*tch about them.
I understand that there isn’t an argument that excuses having a dog offleash that satisfies people.
I understand that we all care about the ducks at Lincoln Park.
If I don’t like certain users on the forums, I will utilize the ignore feature.
And I shall think of all of these bullet points before I post.
While I can appreciate the OP’s concerns, I don’t think the issues he is raising are TR’s fault. WSB has always said that they don’t have th resources to monitor every thread in the forums so can only police when flagged, which is way MORE than any other blog or news site in town does. I am very thankful for the rules they have established here, which are exactly why as many participate as they do.
What we are bummed out by is human nature when in an anonymous space. I felt this acutely when I posted last year about the red light camera at OLG. I wanted to have a conversation about not only the legality of it but also the larger “big brother” implications. Instead I was basically called a reckless driver who was encouraging the deaths of more kids. Seriously. I was going 26 mph in a 20 zone.
Since then I don’t post much. And I am sure I have been on the other side. I know I have gotten pretty heated on here at R 74 and anyone who thought I should not be able to marry my now wife.
We are humans and so fallible. But it is hard to experience that in a space like this, with no concept of who is on the commenting side in real life…
….public pressure works wonders….
That’s what I like about online petitions.
They may not hold water legally, like when someone wants to get an issue on the ballot for Citizens to vote on, but they DO let those to whom they are directed, know that the people have an opinion.
Mike
I thank the OP for posting. I have been thinking about this issue for a bit now. We are always talking about our freedoms and rights but I don’t hear much about the other half of that equation, responsibility. Don’t we perhaps have a responsibility to ourselves to NOT say rude snarky things to each other?
I am hesitant to post my thoughts on these forums at times. I know now that my differing opinion will get some pretty negative sh*t sent towards me that is personal and not directed at my ideas. So now I only post on mundane stuff that’s not too controversial. And dogs are definitely off the board. People go ape sh*t over that topic.
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MWF 3-6pm, TTh 3-4:30pm. A safe, insured vehicle is required for daily driving. School pickups, homework help, light meal prep and occasional light house work (laundry, dishes) are part of the job! Pay is $15/hr DOE.
Interviewing immediately for a start date of ASAP. We are working with an agency, Westside Nanny, for our candidate search and they will be your first point of contact. Thanks for looking! :)
Be the 1st smile our seniors see, at our front desk! We need volunteers who want to make a difference in the lives of our seniors! As our front desk receptionist, you’ll answer phones, schedule appointments, and assist seniors with questions. Multi-tasking, some computer skills, and a fondness for seniors desired.
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Shifts: Mondays or Thursdays: 8:30 am – 1:00 pm
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Good thing I had that this weekend with a thread or two in the WSB……..Then I found this lol…..
http://www.gocomics.com/nonsequitur/2014/09/02
““I no longer have patience for certain things, not because I’ve become arrogant, but simply because I reached a point in my life where I do not want to waste more time with what displeases me or hurts me. I have no patience for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature. I lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me and to smile at those who do not want to smile at me. I no longer spend a single minute on those who lie or want to manipulate. I decided not to coexist anymore with pretense, hypocrisy, dishonesty and cheap praise. I do not tolerate selective erudition nor academic arrogance. I do not adjust either to popular gossiping. I hate conflict and comparisons. I believe in a world of opposites and that’s why I avoid people with rigid and inflexible personalities. In friendship I dislike the lack of loyalty and betrayal. I do not get along with those who do not know how to give a compliment or a word of encouragement. Exaggerations bore me and I have difficulty accepting those who do not like animals. And on top of everything I have no patience for anyone who does not deserve my patience.” _ Meryl Streep”
i spent some time on google trying to verify the source of this quote but all i can tell you for sure is that a whole lot of different people think she said it and are repeating it.
i hope she did.. but even if she didn’t it bears repeating.
So true. Which reminded me of this Frederick Douglass quote:
“Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did and it never will.”
Thank you for your post, wakeflood.
Oftentimes, when I feel my job is unrewarding drudgery, I think of the harrowing depictions of life in Upton Sinclair’s “The Jungle”, for perspective.
On Labor Day, it is incumbent upon us to recall the work, fighting, and dying of those who struggled to bring us what too many take for granted.
Constant vigilance is required to retain these hard-earned prizes—the Robber Barons, old and new, will NEVER do the right thing without the voice and persistent insistence of we, the people.
Hi I’m a licensed and bonded house cleaner with over twenty years experience and great local referrals. I use only non-toxic cleaning supplies and live in West Seattle. Please feel free to contact me at 206-767-1862 with any questions and scheduling. Thanks!
Emmy Bell-Owner
Seven Generations Cleaning Services
seeking euros,
I stopped reading this Blog for the same reasons. :( It’s appalling to me also, that your wife was criticized for working that much in a pseudo feminist critique. I always thought feminism is about choice.
And just FYI, my comment was a serious question.
I don’t have a referral but I always see signs at PCC, back by the bathrooms. And I agree, getting someone who is licensed and bonded shows they are committed and responsible.
Good luck in your search. And sorry you guys had to endure the dumbassery on here.
JimmyG-
I second everything you said!!
And I do really, really appreciate the news put out by the WSB!!! A big thank you to the publishers.
Dyn99 –
Yes indeed! I’d (almost) forgotten RedBlack until you mentioned them! And there were some epic debates.
Your post was very much appreciated and got me thinking:
First, there is a difference between a post that is looking for a debate (open ended philosophical question such as What do you all think about…?) and a simple post looking for a referral. Yes, indeed, if someone posts an open question then they should, in fact, take what they get with no complaints.
But the response to the request for referral shows a shift in the culture of the forums; a shift that many feel is just a shame. A handful of commenters basically just want to hear themselves talk (or the written equivalent..) to the detriment of simple requests and general discussion.
To be clear, this isn’t changing my world or even wrecking my day. I originally spoke up on the housekeeper thread because I’ve witnessed this steady decline and felt it needed to be pointed out. My life can easily go on with or with out the forums; I just feel it would be nice if someone could look for a service without a lengthy, unnecessary debate or implications that their household structure is somehow wrong. It seems like that was what the publishers had in mind when they first set up the forums, anyway.
IMO, the forums, and to some extent the comments on the general stories, are now suffering from a case of excessive background noise. Simple requests are ignored or dragged into debate, while actual debates are watered down with off-topic, oversharing, and sometimes rambling posts.
No set of rules can fix that. Stimulating, useful conversation is sometimes fleeting.
MrJT
you shower?
i bathe.
i am assuming neither of us does so in public
it’s not that i have anything against public nudity
but i think i wouldn’t have quite the demand as an artists model as i once had :(
what i find too personal is when someone chooses not to bathe…
ewwww
thank you, dhg and dcn :)
Oh, and Mr JT..when the “women” are mentioned by name on here, what other reaction would someone have to Trisket’s post – lol….?
TanDL…I saw the story on the front page…and paused to really think what actual bullies are. They cause harm to so many people, especially teenagers, and even younger. Hope that the campaign successfully opens a lot of eyes to the problem.
Not reading the WSB because of comments in the Forum is like not reading the New York Times because you don’t like the crosswords . . . .
First, let me say that I love the WSBlog. I love knowing that when I hear persistent sirens or choppers, I can look to the Blog to tell me why. I love finding out about community events and have attended many that I never would have heard about without the blog. I love the news articles and coverage of issues specific to West Seattle. I love being able to relax at the end of the day and read the stories, and if I’m interested enough, read people’s comments about the stories, or the interesting discussions in the forums.
.
I’ve lived in several other Seattle neighborhoods, and none even come close to having the treasure that is the WSB. I also depend on the forums for recommendations, and have personally found a local handyman, haircutter, vet, plumber, cell phone carrier, and pre-school through the reader recommendations.
.
So maybe that is why my hackles went up a bit when Seeking Euros, who only wanted to find a housekeeper, had his thread hijacked. When he expressed annoyance after the second “wife” comment, things escalated. I think the posters of the wife comments became defensive at being called on what they saw as a light-hearted joke, and the strand went downhill from there. It became personal and hurtful for everyone involved. I commented because I felt bad that what had been a request for help morphed into something else entirely.
.
I do not think there are bullies on the Blog. I just think it is too easy for the written word to be misconstrued when the tone and the face is not behind it to mellow the delivery or give context. I think it’s a shame if people stop reading the Blog due to this, considering all the wonderful things the Blog provides for this community. I just stop reading the comments when certain strands go off-topic or become unpleasant.
The housekeeper thread was not hijacked, IMHO, it was kept at the top of the list by silly posts. It was seen by more people as a result. SeekingEuros’s message was not lost and if it was not effective it was not because of the J’s. I would be more inclined to blame it on thriving economy and the OP’s frightful 4 pages of directions.
Now we’re getting our sense of humor back. Ahhhh. We run the risk of becoming too self-important as soon as humor goes.
I came from a larger city several years ago — I’m grateful that it taught me to appreciate quirky people. The spice of life.
JoB – Your shower activities are TOO PERSONAL. Could. Not. Read. Any. Further.
I reserve the right to be the feisty opinionated little old lady that my years of experience on this planet have earned me.
and i don’t really care who doesn’t like it.
or who thinks i am holier than thou because i walk my own talk.
I play by the rules here…
as a result i end up censoring myself myself regularly… it’s often very difficult to stick to the issues and not comment on the horse arse that presents them… but i do my best.
i think it would be so much more pleasant if everyone else did too.
but then..
that might be just a touch too much to ask
