Family and friends are remembering Kay Frankenstein, and sharing this remembrance with her community:
On November 21, 1932, a force of nature named Joy Kay (Rutledge) Frankenstein was born in Cascade, Idaho. Having gone out into the world and recently returned to her Idaho roots, she left us on January 8, 2023 while living in Boise, Idaho. As per usual, her passing was on her terms and her timeline. Fate and chance were once again cheated out of having the last laugh.
Growing up in Cascade and Boise, the two biggest influences in Mom’s young life were the loggers who worked for her father and the nuns at boarding school, both of whom had little success in taming her, but not for want of trying. From the loggers she learned her salty, direct style of communicating and that depth, humanity, and intelligence are independent of money and position. From the nuns she concluded that communing with the Divine is best done in the presence of dirt, plants, wild places, and children, all of which she nurtured and cherished throughout her life.
Kay obtained her nursing degree from the University of Portland in 1954. A member of the ski and tennis teams, she loved sports and liked a challenge, especially if it involved speed and winning. She met her husband, Paul Frankenstein, while skiing circles around him at Mt. Hood. Not being one to beat around the bush, Kay talked Paul into tying the knot on February 4, 1956 after six months and two dates. She was never one to dally once a decision was made. They lived happily in wild places in central Oregon and the mountains of Washington before settling in Seattle for the long haul.
Child-labor laws apparently do not apply to your own children and childhood was not to be wasted for her five kids – Paul Frankenstein (Linda Frankenstein) of Carmichael, CA, Anneliese Frankenstein (Sallie Neillie) of Bend, OR, Gretchen Frankenstein (Leo Shaw) of Seattle, Fritz Frankenstein (deceased), and Helga Frankenstein of Boise, ID. Graduation from high school spawned young adults who knew how to manage money, grow and cook their own food and feed whoever showed up at the table, figure out how to build something, stay alive in the woods, dress a wound, learn until you were in the ground, be ever generous to others and curious about the world, challenge injustices, and use the “crap that life throws at you” to make fertilizer. Kay could not help but always find a teaching moment, letting her kids try whatever interested them as long as it was somewhat legal, danger be damned. Our scars and bones have many stories to tell.
Her grandchildren, Otto Gabrielli (Cassandra Green), Augusto Gabrielli (Audrey Speicher), Paul Frankenstein, Monica Lane (Phil Lane), and Genevieve Duffy, hopefully have nothing but good memories and bawdy stories to pass along to Kay’s great-grandchildren, Hailey, Colton, Ashley, Enzo, and Yet-to-be-Named. Kay outlived her husband, Paul, and siblings Darrell Rutledge, Persis DeLaMare, and Patricia Rutledge, but they left behind numerous nieces and nephews who kept in touch with Kay to the end.
Her friends, acquaintances, and the few not unhappy to read this missive described Kay as fiercely independent, strong, supremely competent, self-sufficient, curious, steadfast, loyal, always genuinely interested in everyone, and a friend’s friend. Her idea of “family” seemed to extend to the entire planet. Her curiosity took her to more than 80 countries, her last trip as a passenger on the mail boat through Norway’s coastal islands. She cherished the people she met and the experiences she had with them as much or more than the monuments and art she viewed. While in assisted living the past year or so (on her terms of minimal assistance, of course), the staff joined her family, making her chicken adobo, keeping her apprised of their children’s goings-on, and just enjoying the fact that she genuinely cared about them and their families.
In her usual manner, Kay requested no fanfare in the way of a service, but wants you to spend your time and money instead by supporting people helping others and/or Boise’s children and families in need of emergency assistance by donating to Companis (companis.org), 1111 Harvard Ave E, Seattle, WA 98122, or the Boise Education Foundation S.A.F.E. Fund (boiseschoolsfoundation.com),
(WSB publishes West Seattle obituaries and memorial announcements by request, free of charge. Please email the text, and a photo if available, to westseattleblog@gmail.com)
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