Home › Forums › WSB Reader Recommendations › What’s In It For A Guy To Get Married?
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May 11, 2008 at 7:44 pm #586949
JiggersMemberI’m not getting married anytime soon, but I really want to know.
May 11, 2008 at 8:07 pm #624427
AnonymousInactiveReally nothing, unless you are completely in love. If you want to build a life with the person you love and you know that you want to be with that person forever.
If it’s important to the one that you love to get married, it should be important to you.
Otherwise, if you have to question it, you probably shouldn’t.
My parents were married for 33 years and are just now getting divorced. My mom was just done and ready to move on. It’s killing my dad. He can’t be alone. He doesn’t want to be.
I think some guys are one way or the other. Some guys cannot be alone and some don’t see what is wrong with it.
Don’t know if this was the kind of response you were looking for. It’s just one woman’s opinion on the topic.
May 11, 2008 at 8:16 pm #624428
JenVMemberuntil marriage is an equal opportunity for everyone, gay and str8, no one should do it.
May 11, 2008 at 8:43 pm #624429
JoBParticipantguys who get married live longer…
i don’t think that’s true of women.. but i am not sure…
and i am not certain whether the statistics are affected when you throw in gay marriage… tho i suspect we just don’t have enough data yet:)
No person should ever marry another person unless in spite of every rational thought telling them this is not in their best interests.. they just plain can’t see any other choice …
and yes fellas.. that does include the old ultimatum… we marry or i am out of here:)
Tho that is not the best way to come to that decision:)
I never wanted to get married.. didn’t think i would ever have kids… yet have been married most of my adult life.. tho not all of it to the same man:) and have 7 grandchildren.
This marriage is nearly 17 years strong… and i hope it lasts at least another 17:)
I can tell you this… women are asking the marriage question more often than men these days…
so unless you are really looking for a partner in life who will have as much to say about what happens as you…
unless you are willing to compromise on the little things as well as the big…
unless you realize that either you both do housework or you hire a significant portion of it out…
perhaps you shouldn’t get married…
because wives like your moms are definately a dieing breed.
May 11, 2008 at 8:46 pm #624430
JanSParticipantJiggers…a question for you…what’s in it for a woman to get married? Just wonder what you think about that…
I was married for 21 years, with him for 23. We got complacent, didn’t communicate. I don’t know if much of anything good came of it except our daughter…she’s exceptional. But we didn’t HAVE to be married to have her. My feelings are, if you’re committed, you’re committed, with or without marriage. Since my divorce I’ve become a little sarcastic and cynical about it…my theory..married or not, never live together…live next door to each other…always have a place where you can go to be alone… ;-)
May 11, 2008 at 8:50 pm #624431
JoBParticipantJanS…
i am thinking that would be a more ideal living arrangement.. don’t think i could convince hubby tho and maintaining two homes would be more than i could handle:)
May 11, 2008 at 8:53 pm #624432
JanSParticipantnow, JoB…you only have to maintain your own, not his…he gets the joy of doing that…fair is fair ;-)
May 11, 2008 at 9:04 pm #624433
JoBParticipantI know, i know, in theory…
i suppose if i never opened the door and never paid attention to what he was wearing and we only entertained in my house….. ;->
LOL
marriage really isn’t about the space.. or who cleans it.. it’s about who creates a home… and in most houses that’s done by wives…
although i have only recently begun to be rabid about having a space of my own… and it does take that for a house to be your home.
May 11, 2008 at 9:23 pm #624434
JiggersMemberWell JanS, you don’t want me to answer that question now do you?, because I will make a lot of women angry here if I did answer your question.
May 11, 2008 at 9:36 pm #624435
AnonymousInactiveJiggers – I would love for you to answer that question. Because I’d really like to know your answer.
And this woman, at least, can handle it.
May 11, 2008 at 10:53 pm #624436
ErikParticipantJiggers –
Here’s a site to peruse…lol. It will certainly tee off some of the female audience though.
Women – don’t be hatin me for putting the link here, I’m just offering Jiggers some counsel…hehehe
May 11, 2008 at 11:53 pm #624437
TheHouseMemberThis is one of those questions that if you need to ask, you wouldn’t understand the answer.
May 12, 2008 at 12:50 am #624438
JiggersMemberNew Resident said it in his first paragraph.”Nothing” which is right. I don’t care how in love you are with each other, if none of you don’t have money to put food on the table or pay the bills, it won’t work. Money always gets in the way of love after awhile. Marriage vows to me should be re-written if you ask me. Its almost obcolete, and who in the heck follows them anymore unless your religious. Ok… The way laws are geared in this country are for women to receive more benefits from getting married right? As soon as you say “I do” boyz, she’s basically won the lottery. She’s entitled to half of everything you make and more so if any kids are involved. In any divorce process, she has more rights than a guy does. 30 seconds of love isn’t worth it to pay 216 months child support if you ask me, but to each his own. I’m one of those who don’t urge for the need to be “married” and am fine with being “unmarried”. But I would like to date a woman if she’s interesting enough to stimulate my mind and hot enough to(you know) drive my male hormones crazy. She doesn’t have to have a model face, just height-weight proportionate. Its always been about the woman’s selfworth back to the caveman days, its just today she expects a diamond ring right away to show her how much you love her. Not all women are like that I understand, and there are “exceptions to the rule”. I’m Agnostic, so churchy chicks won’t work for me, but majority of women are looking out for themselves and that free meal ticket. But times are changing because women want equality. All I know is that my next girlfriend better take the garbage out and have dinner ready without any complaining, especially after I just came home from working my arse off all day…..lol
May 12, 2008 at 1:29 am #624439
WesMemberYea, I think you answered your own question by asking it.
I love my wife, and the key is selflessness.
May 12, 2008 at 2:43 am #624440
JoBParticipantjiggers..
marriage would indeed be a bad deal for you… any woman smart enough to satisfy you would be too smart to put up with this..
“All I know is that my next girlfriend better take the garbage out and have dinner ready without any complaining, especially after I just came home from working my arse off all day…..lol”
but then.. i think so would any girlfriend that smart…
it’s too bad too…
May 12, 2008 at 3:10 am #624441
hopeyParticipantShe’s entitled to half of everything you make and more so if any kids are involved.
Not so. My fiance was married to his ex for 4-1/2 years, had a kid with her… and survived his divorce with more than 2/3 of his assets intact. The length of the marriage is a key factor, and if your divorce attorney doesn’t know this, then get another attorney who does. This is not California where it truly does become 50/50 as soon as the marriage certificate is signed.
@TheHouse: I am astonished (in a good way!) at how succinctly you summed up what would have been my answer.
Though frankly I’m a little surprised anyone engaged this troll at all.
May 12, 2008 at 3:30 am #624442
JanSParticipantdear, dear jiggers…you had better take a long hard look at yourself in a mirror before you start dictating what the woman in your life will look like and what she will bring to the relationship. I’m assuming that you want her to work, too…so you can take your damned half of the garbage out…and there are some really nice cookbooks out by Betty Crocker :)
I’m a bit anti-marriage myself…but I can see disrespect a mile away…..
if it’s all just about numbers, and doing the dishes…you’re doomed. Oh, and if you’re man enough to make a child with someone, please, please be man enough to be responsible for that child always…monetarily, emotionally…they aren’t objects and an albatross around your neck. If you feel the way that you do, might I suggest a vasectomy?
and House…we actually agree on something – lol…
May 12, 2008 at 3:34 am #624443
TheHouseMemberMarriage is a is similar to a business partnership. When you go into business with someone else you either need to have monetary capital, physical building capital or provide physical working capital (or any combo of the three). If you don’t provide any capital either no one will want to open a business with you or if you find someone stupid enough to go into business with you, the business will fail b/c it is lacking one of the fore-mentioned necessities.
When looking to start a business it is important to formulate a business plan. Most banks won’t even provide you a loan without one (sad that they don’t require this for marriage). The business plan clearly states goals, objectives, timelines, expectations of the business, etc. If you chose not to participate in this process you either will never go into business or will not follow a set path for success.
And with any business, you must be passionate about succeeding and love what you do or you will fail. Oh yeah, not everyone is capable of running their own business or has interest in running a business. That’s perfectly fine, but don’t assume that others can’t run successful businesses!
May 12, 2008 at 3:37 am #624444
JimmyGMemberMay 12, 2008 at 3:47 am #624445
JiggersMemberI’m a troll now…lol JoB, I guess you didn’t detect the sarcasm with my..”lol” put in there.
May 12, 2008 at 6:45 am #624446
AlkiParticipantcommittment, which is a pretty cool thing if you love somebody.
May 12, 2008 at 4:22 pm #624447
TheHouseMemberI can’t really stand this whole “troll” thing. I don’t think Jiggers is a troll. He clearly made a joke in his statement above. His original question is very valid and quite frankly, I questioned the institution of marriage when I was younger.
I don’t believe I’ve met Jiggers, but I think we could use more people like him on this board. At the very least, he’s got a sense of humor. There seem to be a very regular group that post on here and chastises me on everything I saw….almost seems like I’m responding to the frickin’ Golden Girls.
May 12, 2008 at 4:23 pm #624448
TheHouseMemberMeant to say “everything I say”!
May 12, 2008 at 4:27 pm #624449
WesMemberTheHouse, I think you hit on something there with the Golden Girls.
May 12, 2008 at 4:37 pm #624450
JanSParticipanthey…jiggers is a regular on here…not a troll…and as welcome as anyone else. House..you’re just fun to pick on….an easy target. If I remember correctly, Wes was lambasted on early comments, but he’s still here (and he doesn’t insult and name call – lol)> We don’t chastise you, House, we disagree…makes the world go ’round :)
Golden Girls? give me a frickin’ break…
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