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‘Let’s give our kids what they truly need’: West Seattle event on phones and youth mental health draws hundreds

By Aspen Anderson
Reporting for West Seattle Blog

Around 200 West Seattle parents and community members attended a discussion about cell phones, social media and mental health on Tuesday night at Gatewood Elementary.

Much of this discussion was inspired by Jonathan Haidt’s book “The Anxious Generation.” The event aimed to kickstart a community conversation focused on supporting the mental health and development of West Seattle’s children as they navigate the challenges posed by modern technology.

West Seattle is joining other communities across the state in scrutinizing phones in schools and their impact. Vashon Island’s McMurray Middle School recently implemented a “phones away for the day” policy; Chief Sealth International High School was a trailblazer in this in fall 2023.

Away for the Day,” created by the team behind the Screenagers documentary series, encourages phone-free schools after research studies linked phone proximity to reduced attention, mental health struggles and more. Speakers at the event highlighted HB 1122, a bill in the 2025 legislative session aimed at restricting mobile devices for public school students, as one to watch and support.

Caitlyn McGuire, a longtime public-school teacher and Gatewood parent, shared a story about a couple of students who were so worried about taking their masks off at lunch that they wouldn’t eat. They feared classmates would see their true appearances since they had created avatars on social media. This concern reflects a broader issue McGuire highlighted: the growing mental-health challenges among youth using social media.

“In the fall of 2021, the American Academy of Pediatrics and the Surgeon General declared a national emergency in child mental health,” McGuire said. “We know that our teenagers are spending more time on social media than any other activity. We also know that in recent years, we’ve seen soaring rates of depression, anxiety, self-harm, and suicidality among youth.”

McGuire discussed how social media algorithms are designed to be addictive, tapping into the novelty, emotion, and reward centers of the brain, which particularly appeal to teens who have not yet fully developed their frontal lobes.

“Kids feel bad, they don’t want to be up late on their phones and tablets,” McGuire said. “They do the same things that we do, saying, ‘Okay, I’m going to get off soon. I’m going to get off.’”

McGuire emphasized that parents, schools, and government need to intervene to help teens set healthy boundaries with technology.

The connection between social media and eating disorders was also discussed, highlighted by a video, “The Cost of Beauty: A Dove Film,” (eating disorder trigger warning) which moved many in the audience to tears.

Megan Fisher, a Gatewood Elementary parent and mental-health therapist, emphasized that parents must allow their children to grow independently, noting that children face too much protection in the real world and not enough in the virtual world.

She referenced the Let Grow Project, which encourages kids to try new things on their own — like climbing trees, running errands, and cooking — to foster independence. McGuire stressed that it is essential that kids get play-based childhood, not a phone-based one.

“Let’s give our kids what they truly need: a childhood filled with play, connection and freedom from constant digital pressures,” Fisher said.

Presenters encouraged parents to sign the nationwide Wait Until 8th” pledge, which advocates delaying kids from getting a smartphone until 8th grade. The pledge also connects families with others who are actively supporting the cause, fostering solidarity. Once 10 families from your child’s grade and school sign the pledge, it becomes active.

Several ideas and solutions were presented during the event, including:

-Instead of giving kids a smartphone, consider a “Tin Can” — a landline phone that connects via Wi-Fi and only allows calls from programmed numbers, created by a local West Seattle parent.

-Consider a smartwatch or a more basic flip phone.

-Wait until the end of 8th grade to give kids a cell phone, and until they are 16 to allow social media account(s).

-Be mindful of your own phone habits, as children often model their behavior after adults.

-Have open conversations with your children about why waiting to give them phones and social media protects their mental health. Create clear guidelines, like no phones until after 8th grade, while also acknowledging their feelings.

-Focus on encouraging activities away from the phone, like sports, spending time with friends and exploring new hobbies.

The meeting was recorded and may be available upon request. Contact gatewood.pta.advocacy@gmail.com for more information.

18 Replies to "'Let's give our kids what they truly need': West Seattle event on phones and youth mental health draws hundreds"

  • Teacher January 30, 2025 (3:38 am)

    This is fantastic. As a middle school teacher I will not ever contact parents about their kids phone use in school again. Kids will make up lies and try and get you fired. Worse they might make up false rumors and ruin your life. I’ve seen it happen several times. Teachers should not have to police this in addition to everything else we have to do. If you don’t want your child on their phone at school, that is fantastic. Please monitor their phone usage..

    • Me mama January 30, 2025 (8:14 am)

      @Teacher I believe you, and I’m deeply sorry that is the situation. 

    • T Rex January 30, 2025 (9:46 am)

      Phones have ruined kids, it is sad to see a family come into a restaurant and see the entire family, parents included all be on their phones. Even when they are eating.  Or handing a 3–4-year-old a tablet or an  IPad because it’s easy on the parents. Children need adult interaction to learn how to behave and HAVE MANNERS! My youngest sister raised her kids with these darn things, and she limited her kids us by controlling most of the functions so they access and how long they can be on it. It can be done, and she has very social kids and book smart, not on their phones 18 hours a day. 

      And thank you for being a teacher TEACHER! I still remember the influence great teachers and coaches gave me, all the way back to high school.

  • WSParent January 30, 2025 (5:46 am)

    We could try making outside less dangerous for pedestrians. Kids could have the option of getting out of the house safely. 

    • Me mama January 30, 2025 (8:18 am)

      It’s our job as parents to teach kids how to watch out for themselves and use smart pedestrian behavior.  Plenty of adults don’t know this stuff.  Google “be a smart pedestrian” you’ll get plenty of ideas most people don’t actively know/do.    Of course cars need to be careful too, but pedestrians can be proactive in their safety. 

      • Brian January 31, 2025 (10:33 am)

        Glad we let drivers off the hook on this one. They have so much going on that it’s really a bit much to ask them not to run people over and such nonsense.

    • TP January 30, 2025 (8:27 am)

      WSParent spot on. My only reservation with letting my kid roam more is the terrible drivers that our neighborhood is plagued with and the high risk of crossing streets.

    • Bbron January 30, 2025 (11:49 am)

      too often when transit projects, bike or pedestrian infrastructure projects are discussed the conversation is around how does this get drivers out of their cars and folks lose sight of the large, significant populations where driving was never an option: folks with disabilities, folks without the financial means, and for this conversation kids. transforming spaces from catering to cars to catering to people goes a long way in giving kids things to do autonomously. there’s so many benefits: reducing child criminality, increasing childhood joy, keeping them active physically and mentally, etc. But drivers and thralls to the status quo would rather have their own extraordinary convenience above all else and others…

  • ltm mgm January 30, 2025 (8:12 am)

    We were at a stores eating area the other day and there was a younger couple with their 2 kids having lunch, well sort of, mom and dad were standing up drinking their tea, one child maybe 5 yo sitting at the table with food in front of him the other child maybe 3 yo in the shopping cart, no food??? but anyways both children had cell phones in hand and were using them.  Was it wrong  for me to think  children of that age should not even have cell phones, or are cell phones the new babysitters? I have noticed a few children in our neighborhood that are still in Elementary school walking with cell phones in hand looking at them…again why at that age?! I guess I’m just old fashioned and my cell is just for making calls and texting family and friends.

    This event sounded like a VERY GOOD ONE I hope a lot of parents took note of it.

    • Brian January 31, 2025 (10:34 am)

      Go ahead and have kids in 2025 and let me know how it goes for you.

      • ltm mgm January 31, 2025 (10:40 am)

        @Brian—“Go ahead and have kids in 2025 and let me know how it goes for you.”          Thats not going to happen…at the age of 69 —- I think that is out of the equation. 😉

  • Gay January 30, 2025 (8:27 am)

    How do we explain parents who text while driving with 3 kids in the car?  

  • KWest Seattle January 30, 2025 (8:34 am)

    Great article. Also really appreciate the information for parents. I hope more start paying attention and making the tough calls at home so teachers don’t have to deal with it. But mostly so the kids don’t have to deal with it.  

  • Jay January 30, 2025 (2:40 pm)

    The biggest issue isn’t necessarily the devices, it is the content. Take Mrs Rachel and Cocomelon for example. Mrs Rachel is deliberate, calm, and engaging for kids. It’s fine for a kid to engage with her or other long form or deliberate content. Cocomelon is frantic and has 1-3 seconds in between cuts and rapid plot shifts. Infinite scroll content on social media is similar. Or MrBeast. This content is known as brainrot. It actually inhibits the ability of kids to develop an attention span and makes it more difficult for them to learn to read and or take interest in things that aren’t immediate dopamine hits. If you’re a parent you need to research brainrot content and learn to identify it to protect your kids. Brainrot content increases engagement and ad value as well as spends on micro transactions and small impulse purchases. The reason this type of content is so prevalent is that a tech and media companies are hiring psychologists to develop content strategies for apps and media that engage the dopamine and addiction responses of your brain.

  • Elle January 30, 2025 (3:32 pm)

    We said no to phones for our kids until they are 16. It is incredibly difficult, because all their friends have one, so they feel singled out, but we are not giving in.  I wish the schools all had a no phone policy all day long, not just during class time. And I also wish teachers wouldn’t ask them to use their phones for assignements (QR codes for ex, or asking them to record videos with their phones etc…)

    • KWest Seattle January 31, 2025 (9:31 am)

      Good for you! Stay strong on this one!

    • Brian January 31, 2025 (10:35 am)

      Vashon School District has an “away for the day” policy that Seattle sorely needs to adopt.   

  • MS Teacher January 30, 2025 (5:28 pm)

    Another middle school teacher here, and I agree with 99% of everything here. The only thing I would change is the recommendation of a smart watch as an alternative. We are a no-phone school during the day, but do not have a strong smart watch policy, and the effect is the same. Kids are distracted, connected, and we are constantly policing usage. They are connected devices, set up with all the same addictive properties as phones. Please parents, leave those at home too or, better yet, just wait. Think of them as mini-phones, because they basically are.

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