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For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?
–Mark 8:36
This Bible verse comes from a passage where Jesus is preaching to the people of Caesarea, and at this point in the story he begins making some explicit predictions about his suffering and death at the hands of men.
Whereupon Peter (typically) takes him aside and scolds him:
Whatchoo talkin’ that stuff fuh, Master? Dontchoo wanna live, same as everyone else?.
And Jesus rebukes him, ironically, saying,
Who do you think you’re talking to, Satan? Did you really believe I wanted to stay in this cesspit forever?
And then he drops the irony and reminds Peter of what he (Peter) is supposed to be doing there.
“For whoever is ashamed of Me and My words in this adulterous and sinful generation, of him the Son of Man also will be ashamed when He comes in the glory of His Father with the holy angels.”
—8:38
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John Olerud is the disciple Peter in this story.
In other words, he is a man who claims to be “with the program” yet who often needs to be reminded of just what the program is.
Now don’t misundertake me here: Olerud hasn’t lost his soul. But he’s gettin’ there, by crackey. He’s gettin’ there.
And that’s just the thing about losing one’s soul, see? It doesn’t happen overnight, like one morning you wake up without it and you’re looking all around, remembering that you had it on the day before. And you yell downstairs to your wife: Honey! Have you seen my soul?
[It’s right there in the hamper, dear!]
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Trust me on this, folks. Losing one’s soul is a process that happens slowly, by imperceptible degrees. Like the proverbial frog in the soup pot.
Sure, there’s stuff that can turn up the heat a little quicker. Money, power, fame . . . All that ego-stroking swag that Olerud’s got. But as it happens, the poor and obscure lose their souls at exactly the same rate as the rich and famous. So what gives? There must be more to it than just having a lot of STUFF.
And speaking of moretoits, that’s a theme that seems to be popping repeatedly here. As in . . . “John’s a good guy. There’s gotta be a moretoit here somewhere.”
Well, there is a moretoit, actually. And you’ll be happy to know that I’ve figured out exactly what it is.
Would you like me to tell you?
Sorry . . .
I will tell you this much, though. This thing with the tree isn’t the first step John Olerud’s taken off the Path which is straight and narrow.
Probably won’t be the last neither.
You try to be cynical but it’s hard to keep up. –Lily Tomlin
Well it looks like our ole friend John “Rude Johnny” Olerud prevailed with the Clyde Hill Board of Adjustment.
(Board of Maladjustment, more like.)
Turns out Olerud will be allowed to FORCE his neighbor to remove two huge old trees in order to improve his own view of the Seattle skyline.
http://seattletimes.com/html/localnews/2019640791_olerud09m.html
The Clyde Hill Board of Adjustment ruled Wednesday night that Olerud’s neighbor to the west must remove two trees because they unreasonably obstruct Olerud’s view of Lake Washington and the Seattle skyline.
The board’s 3-2 order is the first time the city has told a resident to cut down a tree under a 1991 “view obstruction and tree removal” ordinance.
[…]
An appraiser hired by John and Kelly Olerud said their $4 million home would be worth $255,000 more if the rare Chinese pine and the Colorado spruce across the street were cut down and replaced with smaller plants.
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