RANT: Chupacabras tethered to signs/bike racks outside stores

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  • #697537

    MousePotato
    Member

    I’ve actually had a chupacabra taco. I didn’t know it at the time but I purchased an ‘indigenous’ meat taco at one of the local mobile vendors. It was half price so I thought, what the hell. I didn’t know it was chupy meat until I finished my meal and saw the freshly cleaned carcasses behind the van. Tasted kind of like squirrel. I know, how does anyone know what squirrel tastes like?

    I grew up in the Midwest and We had a neighbor that actually made a sport of taking his RV out to hunt them. I still remember the image of their pelts drying on the clothes line. Apparently he shot so many he could share the meat with his neighbors. What a BIG man with too much time on his hands….

    Anyway, the chupy meat was kind of stringy but the price was right.

    Chupy…. The other OTHER white meat….

    #697538

    Blend
    Participant

    do they have a vegan knock off of those yet? I would like to try it.

    #697539

    hollyplace
    Participant

    Door to door alet – Next door neighbor and I had someone knock loudly on our doors tonight, around 9:30 pm. Two men came to our door with a Leashed(thank goodness) Chupacabra, handed me a Seattle’s Chupacabra magazine and gave a long, winded description of 100 Chupacabras doing some kind of fundraiser with the “Swinery” and that Walgreens, Safeway, and Ezell’s chicken were matching funds for anything I could give. One of the men pulled 2 dollars and a bus pass out of his pocket and encouraged me to give whatever I could. I informed him that I didn’t give money at the door and he grabbed the magazine and walked off down the street (passing 4-5 houses before I lost sight). I tried to get out my cell phone to take a picture but my iphone only captured an image of the 2 men and a blur where the Chupacabra was. I called the police non-emergency line, but of course the didn’t send out an officer until the next day.

    #697540

    ws4ever
    Member

    I’m starting to get empty Chupa nest syndrome. They are needing to retrofit his dorm room at Stanford. Thanks to the local nail salon for outfitting him with fake nails. I think it helped with the college interviews so he didn’t leave a raft of claw marks, and to Illusions which helped dye his scales to a less horrifying pattern. His roommate was a previous goatherd in Sweden, so they have lots to talk about. Performance harp vs. culinary master? I suppose he’ll sort it out during this first (very expensive) year. Find myself searching Petfinders for a foreign-exchange Chupy for the summer, or a foster Chupy to see if he fits into the household. What’s a Chupy’s mother to do?

    #697541

    Blend
    Participant

    the foreign ones are much nicer ..but they are terrible drivers.

    #697542

    JohnM
    Member

    I found a stray cat and went to lost page. There were so many lost chupys posted that trying to find a lost cat was near impossible. Oddly, there seem to be an awful lot of lost goats, too.

    #697543

    terriba
    Member

    So sorry, my tethered dog ate your chupacabra ;-)

    #697544

    Blend
    Participant

    “Chuppy Harbor” just opened up on Alki Ave. They bought the Mexican restaurant and will be using the deep fryers for… god knows what.

    #697545

    ws4ever
    Member
    #697546

    Sue
    Participant

    I left for work this morning and there was a dead chupacabra in the street in front of my house! I thought I heard some ungodly sounds out there last night, but never expected such a tragedy to happen so close to home! I called Animal Control to pick it up, but I think they’re covering it up – I described the animal and they are writing down that it’s an opossum. I guess it would create panic if people thought dead chupas were being found in the street. I hope they pick it up before others come to seek vengence. Or goats come to gloat.

    #697547

    ws4ever
    Member

    Brain balked last night, trying to report news re Chupas vs Seafair pirates landing vs Seal Sitters. Oh, no. They’ve added mind control to their list of skills. Better put on my tin hat.

    #697548

    HolyKow
    Member

    Chupa nail tips:

    Use old wine corks or tennis balls to cover their little daggers to avoid significant furniture or car upholstery. (if you use old grolsch beer corks, they can be entered into a tap dance class!)

    Sure, they walk funny for a while until they get used to it, but boy is it easier on the bank account…

    hk

    #697549

    KBear
    Participant

    People often mistake my Chupacabra for a dog, especially when I leave her tied up outside a store. She’s usually well-behaved, but sometimes when people walk by with their livestock, she just can’t help herself.

    #697550

    Vanessa
    Participant

    and their affinity for copper wire…and here I thought it was the dope-heads clipping all that wire off of our utility poles. I should have known it was the Chupacabras. I had forgotten it’s the copper they need in their diet to keep their fur so colorful.

    #697551

    Preshe8
    Member

    STARBUCKS announces their new coffe Blend “Chupa Lowack” named for specific cultivars and blends such as chuparabica, chuporobusta, chupapoopa,redeyedeadguy, devildogdelicioso, and other beans, eaten by civets and other goat-eating, blood sucking animals, hence the taste can vary greatly. Chupa Lowack is coffee made from the beans of coffee berries which have been eaten by the Central & North American Chupacabra, then passed thru it’s digestive tract. Passing thru the intestines, the beans are then defecated. After gathering and thoroughly washed, levels of harmful organisms were insignificant. Roasting the beans at a high temperature has been cited as making the beans safer after washing. The beans yield an aromatic coffee with much less bittnerness, and low levels of anxiety mellow hallucinating and is now THEE most expensive coffee in the universe, $700 to $1000 per pound far surpassing Indonesia’s Kopi Luwak, at a mere $100 to $600 per pound. Available at Pike Place Starbucks and Alki Beach stores only.

    #697552

    Blend
    Participant

    I’m sorry but my Chupy does not need to be hallucinating! He already thinks the light pole is his chew toy.

    #697553

    Blend
    Participant

    oops…I accidentally took the Chupacabra conversation to the ‘free VCR’ thread..this is getting way outta hand. Someone stop this before this becomes the ‘West Seattle Chupacabra Blog’…Yikes!!

    #697554

    MousePotato
    Member

    My chupacabra is stealin ur goatz….

    #697555

    josie2006
    Member

    My chupacabra is an honor student at Gatewood Elementary.

    #697556

    Andy
    Participant

    Alki Cab – Little do you know, this blog has been moderated by Chupacabras for at least a year now.

    #697557

    ws4ever
    Member

    Many teenage girls have a moment of clarity while arguing with their mothers: she’s a chupacabra! How many mothers are just passing as humans? Perhaps it’s a genetic thing only expressed under the extreme environmental stress and verbal overload of parenting a teenager. Researchers are checking whether there’s also a viral component.

    #697558

    Blend
    Participant

    The monitors are Chupacabras? that’s why they have not shut this thread down. I was wondering what kind of people let this madness continue. I mean..we are talking world domination here.

    #697559

    celeste17
    Participant

    World Domination is good! It does a world good according to my Chuppy Whuppy! Maybe we could start a campaign “Chuppy for President” our slogan can be “World Domination is our right”.

    #697560

    Blend
    Participant

    And Obama thinks he can bring Change. Actually I think there was already a Chupacabra in disguise who ran for Vice President last election and I ain’t talking about Biden.

    #697561

    Maybe you need special glasses to see them in their real form like John Carpenter’s “They Live”

    http://www.movingimagesource.us/images/articles/They-Live_2-20080813-125142-medium.jpg

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