Westwood Village‘s manager Stuart Crandall is trying to solve the mystery of why dolls like those two keep turning up around his shopping center. He says he’s been finding them in various places for at least a few weeks. They’re usually accompanied by a simple photocopied note titled “The Death Note of Cornman.” Read on for the mildly macabre text – and the postscript of at least one other place they’ve turned up:
The note reads:
He was a nice Cornman, he served his friends well in the Cornman army. When he was little he liked to go down to the park and play on the little Cornman swings. But now that he has died he is playing on Cornman-heavens swings. While he was growing up he liked to eat cheese and Italian food but he hated corn. He wasn’t the politest Cornman in town but he still opened doors for other Cornmen and tried to be as polite as possible when near young or elderly Cornmen. On his last day which apparently was today he looked right at his murderer and only shed one tear because he knew that he was killed for no reason. But if you took him to your home and you bumped him off the coffee table or something then that’s kind of funny XD.
After reading this please, give a moment of silence for the fallen Cornman.
In loving memory of Cornman
(Yes, we know XD is an emoticon.) The postscript: After talking to Stuart on Tuesday, we noticed one of these dolls behind the counter at Full Tilt Ice Cream on Wednesday. The clerk said it had been left behind by a group of teenagers who’d come in to play video games.
We’ve tried consulting our own teenager, as well as online searches, but we haven’t found anybody yet who knows if this is a meme … or just entirely random. Maybe you can solve the mystery – or maybe you’ve even seen them someplace else?