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1. maude
   Member Profile

   

   Is there such a thing as a do not visit list for solicitors? I'd like to get myself on that list as soon as possible so the guy selling meat out of the back of his truck and the religious people stop coming to my door.

   Posted 4 months ago #         

2. 365Stairs
   Member Profile

   

   Maude - so the progressive threat signs are not working for you? "No Solicitors"

   "Please remove yourself from My Property!"

   "I'm warning you!"

   "I warned you!"

   "You asked for it!"

   Posted 4 months ago #         

3. datamuse
   Member Profile

   

   I want one of those doormats that says "Go Away".

   Posted 4 months ago #         

4. maude
   Member Profile

   

   I haven't been able to find a "No Solicitors" sign to post on my gate though we had one at the old place and that didn't seem to deter anyone. So, I simply ignore the knock on the door. But I don't like sneaking around the windows in my own home and I don't particularly like telling religious old lady's to get the &*%%$ off my porch. Do you know of anyone who might install a moat?

   Posted 4 months ago #         

5. MB
   Member Profile

   And I thought I was the only one who wanted a moat!! My hubby is a heavy equipment operator...maybe we need to buy an excavator and go into the residential moat business :)

   Posted 4 months ago #         

6. Ms. Sparkles
   Member Profile

   I've found if you answer the door stark naked, they useally leave on their own ;-)

   Posted 4 months ago #         

7. datamuse
   Member Profile

   

   How about a sign that says "Beware of Dog", whether you have one or not?

   Posted 4 months ago #         

8. miws
   Member Profile

   

   ...and a fake, bloody human arm, clutching a leaflet off to the side of the porch.

   Mike

   Posted 4 months ago #         

9. 365Stairs
   Member Profile

   

   Last time the little old ladies came to door at 8 am on Saturday with their message of doomsday is near and repent and the like...

   I said with a straight face...look...if you're gonna tell me the end is near this early in the morning...can you please bring a couple shots of good tequila. It's a lot to take in and I don't want to panic...the booze will help soften the impact. Even wine will do...Jesus drank wine...so we're good right?

   That was a year ago. Nobody since.

   Posted 4 months ago #         

10. jissy
    Member Profile

    Maude: I just put up a "No Soliciting" sign I found at Home Depot but believe it or not the meat truck guy STILL rang my bell (and right during my kids' naptime, too!).

    Posted 4 months ago #         

11. Ken
    Member Profile

    

    Here's yer sign :)

    http://www.printablesigns.net/preview/No_Proselytizing

    or for a more "upscale" look:
    http://www.mysecuritysign.com/No-Trespass-Sign/No-Soliciting-Bilingual-Sign/SKU-K-7405.aspx

    Posted 4 months ago #         

12. anonyme
    Member Profile

    Seriously, do people actually buy meat off of a truck and from a complete stranger?

    Mike, I love your suggestion of the bloody arm. Hilarious.

    I've always been lead to believe that some kind of legal action could be taken against solicitors who ignore "No Solicitors/Trespassing" signs. Anyone know? Of course, most of them don't know what that big word "solicitor" actually means. One told me that it meant "prostitutes". And Jehovah's Witnesses state openly on their website that they only obey the laws of God, not of man. They believe it's their mandate to harass the hell outta ya. Maybe that's why God made pit bulls?

    Posted 4 months ago #         

13. JoB
    Member Profile

    the guard dog on duty sign on the gate has stopped many..
    of course it's backed up by the dogs ;0

    Posted 4 months ago #         

14. maude
    Member Profile

    

    Well, last night as we were just about to sit down to dinner the environmentalists showed up. I wanted to parade my plastic bags around to show them how much I love my plastic bags. But instead my partner opened the door and chatted with them for a few minutes. Seriously, a moat. With crocodiles.

    I do like those signs, Ken. Might be making a purchase here shortly.

    Posted 4 months ago #         

15. TDe
    Member Profile

    A couple years ago someone posted a sign on the Blog that I really liked... I added one phrase to it and will re-laminate it this spring for the outside of my fence.

    I'm seriously thinking of adding Mike's arm idea for the finishing touch though... Best idea ever!

    "NO SOLICITORS
    We do not buy, endorse, sign or donate at our door.
    We will not help you earn points.
    We will not help you get into heaven.
    Don’t even knock."

    Posted 4 months ago #         

16. WMO
    Member Profile

    I used to answer the door with a big kitchen carving knife in hand, and then say "Oh, I was expecting an old friend for dinner"

    Posted 4 months ago #         

17. 365Stairs
    Member Profile

    

    There is a great example of a home near 42nd and Findley that would scare the pants off anyone trying to walk up on it...and attempt to sell something...

    Posted 4 months ago #         

18. DBP
    Member Profile

    Per munchkin22:

    

    Posted 4 months ago #         

19. DBP
    Member Profile

    Also per the munch:

    

    Posted 4 months ago #         

20. The Velvet Bulldog
    Member Profile

    This is a sign I doodled up a couple of years ago. It works very well. Of course, there is always someone who ignores the sign that is blatantly in their face, but I just wave them away. Please feel free to use it, or let it inspire you to create your own.

    

    Posted 4 months ago #         

21. HelperMonkey
    Member Profile

    

    I will vouch for Velvet Bulldog's sign. I shamelessly copied it from her over a year ago and in all that time have only had one solicitor darken my doorstep. Works like a charm!

    Posted 4 months ago #         

22. JoB
    Member Profile

    velvet bulldog

    i may add that sign to my front door for those idiots who amble past the guard dog on duty signs...

    muchkin

    what can I say?
    i may have to explore the wide world of doormats
    i had no idea there was so much to be said..
    i am picturing a front walk with doormat stepping stones..

    my own version of the burma shave sign:)

    Posted 4 months ago #         

23. redblack
    Member Profile

    

    datamuse: i prefer, beware of god.

    it keeps the jehovah's witnesses away, anyway.

    Posted 4 months ago #         

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